An opportunity to survey the underlying causes of anger and the effects of
anger on our well-being and on our relationships. This session gives
practical solutions for controlling anger, healing the wounds and learning
to live in peace again.
1) Causes of Anger
2) Effects of Anger on our well being and on our relationships
3) Practical solutions for controlling anger
4) How do I let go, heal the wounds of the past, stay peaceful?
5) Why did this happen to me ? Understand Karma philosophy, karmic account. Karmon ki guhya gati ko jaanna hoga. Drama ka gyan
Jo huwa achcha huwa, jo ho raha hai achcha ho raha hai, jo honey wala hai wah aur achcha hoga.
6) What are positive thoughts . PAIN – Positive Attitude in Negative Situation. – with positive thoughts.
7) What positive affirmations(awareness) do I need to have for the self, others and the world ?
8) Permanent solution to live in peace
Accept your past without regret, Handle your present with confidence and face your future without fear.
Start —-
Log kehte hai Bhagwan Sarvavyaapi hai, par dekha jaaye aaz duniya mein Gussa Sarvaantaryami hai. Wars, violence, murders, rape, roz hum media ke dwara tv, newspaper, radio , internet ke madhyam se news sunte hai, iska kaaran gussa hai. Mahilayem, Purush, Bachchey, kisi bhi dharm bhasha, desh, chote – bade, aap jaha bhi jaaye, har jagah aapko easily mil jayega.
Gussa ek abnormal reaction hai, Gusse ki jo intensity – teevrata hai, sab ki alag hoti hai…josh mein aana, aavesh mein aana, chidchidapan, krodh, nafrat, badla lene ki bhavna , irshya, ninda karna, dosh-blame/criticize karna, mood off hona, upset hona, ye sab anger ke different forms hai.
ek hai internal anger(Supress – dabaav ), dusra hai external anger.
External anger jo apne face, aankhom se, bol, karm (behaviour and actions se dikhate hai).
Jor se bolna, gali dena
Kisika chehra gusse se lal ho jata hai,
Koyi dant kattha hai,
Kisiko gusse se paseena aata hai
to koyi mar peet.
Effects of Anger:
Physical level par dekha jaye :
– Suppress karne se Cancer ki bimari ho sakti hai.
– BP rise hoti hai, heart rate badti hai, respiration – breate quickly jaldi shwaas lene lag jate hai, body temperature badti hai.
– Gusse se Heart Attack, Paralysis ho sakta hai. Aisi emotion hai jo insaan ko self paralyze kar deta hai, aur man evam shareer par bura asar karta hai.
– Adrenaline, Noradrenaline, Cortisol, ye stress related hormones hai, jo gusse se body mein release hoti hai jo health ke liye bahut hee nuksankarak hai.
– Ye Immune system ko weak karta hai, Jyada gussa karne valom ko jukham, conjunctivitis aadi aane ke chances hoti hai.
– Brain ko blood supply kam karta hai. Gussa, Jaldi budaapa lata hai.
– Gussa Muscles mein sudden tension badata hai. jiske karan jaldi sar dard hota hai.
Kuch log gusse se action ( violence ) mein bhi aate hai, ek dusre ki jaan tak letey hai. Murder, suicide cases, kidnapping. Wars and terrorism. Violation of Govt. laws.
Drugs, Smoking Drinking, addictions mein chale jaate hai.
Relationships – Gusse se ek dusre ki burai karte hai, ek dusre ke feelings ko tes pahunchta hai, ek doosre se baat karna nahi kartey hai. Kuch gharom mein ek-do mahina pati-patni ek doosre se baat nahi kartey, bachcey aapas mein baat nahi kar rahe hai.
Aur sambandom mein bhi distance aa jata hai,Aur ek bar sambandh toot tha hai, to vuse jodna itna aasan nahi hota. Jo kabhi divorce tak le jata hai.
Job chod dete hai. Kaam postpone karte hai, Apni jimmevariyon responsibilities chod dete hai.
Gussa bahut nuksaankarak hai. Concentration, ekaagr nahi kar patey hai.
Decision making power, nirnay, parakhne ki Shakti khatam karta hai.
Causes of Anger:
- Log mere ichcha anusar nahi chalte hai. – expectations
- Sab kuch mere hisaab se chalna chahiye. – No one Agrees, agya nahi maantey
- Bachpana hai, ek aadat ban gayi hai gusse se vyavhar karne ki
- Koyi jhoot bolta hai
- Anyaay, injustice dekhte hai to sahan nahi hota hai.
- Kuch discussion mein Aap apni baat mein har jaate hai
- Apni kamjori, weakness, galti ko chupane ke liye
- Kisi kaam ko karne ki kshamata nahi, tired ho jate hai
- Koyi aapka apmaan karta hai, ninda karta hai.
- Koyi baat ko taalmol karne ke liye
- Kabhi misunderstanding se bhi gussa aata hai. (Father and son, car key)
- Financial situations- loss in business, health upsets, family circumstances, society upheavals.
- Kisiko traffic jam se bhi gussa aata hai, car parking nahi milti hai to bhi gussa aata hai, tyre puncture huwa to bhi gussa aaya, bus car train late hai, train miss ho gaya, queue mein wait karna padta hai, …simple things in life.
- Climatic conditions – jyada baarish huwa, snow – tandi jyada hai, earthquakes, floods, hot summer.
- Chain reaction bhi hai – office mein kuch huwa boss ne aapke voopar gussa kiya, aapne colleagues ke voopar gussa kiya, aur ghar lauthey hai patni ke voopar gussa kiya, patni ne bachey ke voopar aur kaam vaalom ke voopar gussa kiya…..office se ghar pahuncha, aur ghar se doosre, fir teesre ke ghar pahuncha…so it keeps spreading.
Temporary solutions: To postpone anger.
– Ek glass pani peete hai ( water therapy)
– Shower lete hai
– Numbers count karte hai
– Pranayama, deep breathing, exercise
– Jagah chodkar chale jaate hai ( Timeout concept)
– Pen lekar likhte hai ( Self-check technique)
– Mantr japte hai chanting
*** Practical solutions for controlling anger
– Kuch scenarios batati hu, jab kisiko gussa aata hai, vus mein negative energy ka interchange karte hai.
Ek vyakti aapke paas aaya aur aapke voopar khoob gussa kar ke gaya.
Suppress – Inside Anger ( Internal )
Express – Outside Anger (External )
Heroes – Right way mein hum vuse express kar sake.
Right time, Right tone mein message convey kare.
shanti se, pyar se, raham, daya bhavna se share kare. Aap kya chahte hai, respect se clarity ke sath bataye.
Dadi Janki – Namrata,satyata, dhairyata, Madhurata, Drudta chahiye.
Positive energy ( sakaratmakata ), Forgiveness and Acceptance – they are the children of God.
Ek dusre ke prati shub bhavna, shub kamna, good wishes
Sab ka kalyan ho, bhala ho, sab sukh paye
Iskeliye aapko aantarik Shakti, inner power, inner strength , manobal, dridta, inner potential, aantarik kshamata ki jarurath hai, jo meditation se hee milega.
Atma, Parmata, vishw ek parivar hai, life ek drama hai, is baat ko samajhna hai.
Man mein vishwas, drudta, vumang ho hum krodh mukt ban sakte hai. Aur swa parivartan se vishwa parivartan joroor hoga.
Raaste mein gati ki seema hai
Bank mein paise ki seema hai
Exam mein samay ki seema hai
par aapke man ki soch mein koyi seema nahi hai
Sankalpom ko shudh banaye, sresht banaye, samarth banaye
Switch off to -vity and Switch off to positivity.
Jo Aap ko bhi sukh aur khushi mile aur doosrom ko bhi sukh aur khushi miley.
How do I let go, heal the wounds of the past, stay peaceful?
Ek kahavat hai, Screen the past, Cream the Present and Dream the Future.
- Bhut kal, kehtey hai na, Andar Bhut hai to bhut bangla bana diya. shanti nahi hogi,
- Apne aap ko ye samjhana hai, Past ke baare mein sochne se kuch faida nahi hai. Sirf mein apni energy ko drain kar rahi hu. Past mein jo huwa vuse mein change nahi kar sakti.
- Story of a hunter – shikari, sher, strawberry, pahaad, ped
- Vusi cheez ko pakad kar rakhne se hum vus baat ko bada karte hai. Anavashyak , ya vyarth sankalp kehtey hai vusey Samarth positive sankalp ke sath replace karna hoga.
- Lessons and experience – mature banati.
- Just like there are No Smoking Zone , there has to be No Anger Zone. Har Ghar mein aisa sthaan ho jaha par jaakar silence mein bait jaaye, and become free gussa, chidchidapan, nafrat, irshya, dwesh, from anger, frustration and irritation. Sab kuch let go kar sake. Aap jo huwa vusko likh sakte hai, kayi log likhne ke baad emotionally, mentally free ho jate hai, Bhagwan ko share kar saktey hai. Meditation kar sakte hai…jo mind ko peaceful bananey ka best technique hai.
Let go karne par Jab maaf kartey hai, ek dusre ko sweekar karte hai, care karte hai, tab andar bahut achcha lagta hai.
Tabhi hum antarik sukh shanti ki anubhuti karte hai…aur kya chahiye Jeevan mein. Man ki shanti.
****ek Story hai, ek father aur vunka betey ka. Betey ko bahuth gussa aata . Ghar ke charom vor (ek fence tha, lakdi ka boundary tha… ) Jab bhi gussa aata hai, jaakar vaha ek kheel tokna. To vo karta gaya.